tribute to grilled cheese

sometimes it's gooey

sometimes it's chewy

sometimes it's hard

sometimes it's smooth

it's bubbly with cheese, oozing everywhere

it's filling, it's fluffly, it's down right delicious

i love grilled cheese; for breakfast and dinner, snack time and lunch

grilled cheese is the perfect treat to munch

by noah and mom

the first step

it's a constant drip...drip...drip

it's an incessant fly buzzing around my ear

it's a babble, interference, static, it's low and continuous

it doesn't stop, my first thought competing with all other thoughts in the morning

it's the battleground. And it's in my mind.

everyday I wrestle with a barrage of the unthinkable to the bazaar, the fantastical to the fanciful.

contrast this scuttle, this twisted stream of nonsense with the clarion call

to purity,

to vision,

to mission,

to celebration.

That's the difference. I see it now.

Am I trained as a warrior? A soldier of the mind?

Did I ever think I'd be in the place?

Will the scars of previous skirmishes bring strength and wisdom,

or

will they only entrench me further in my foolish ways?

I am undisciplined, I lack consistency, routine is difficult for me; yet I am bound to them, the foundational pieces that bring health and wholeness. I don't have a choice, the battle rages regardless of my personal preference. It's the essence of being alive, this choosing of the minute by minute path to engage in the battle or stand by, to fight for victory, or be slain by sin. And while forgiveness is always present, it can be the fool's way out, to justify the actions rather than fighting hard...

It's a more noble thing to seek forgiveness while engaged in the battle than to lazily plead mercy for no real effort at all.

I don't have to be so defeated.

I have the weapons to fight.

The First step is to acknowledge the battle exists.

love is enough

hmmm...the sweet fragrance of love

it's enough.

enough to rest in the love that carries me through

uncertainty. and tension. and frustration. and mistakes. yes, lots of mistakes.

and love is enough to hold me through storm after storm.

struggle after flesh and blood struggle.

love is enough to support me when i feel alone.

it's enough to strengthen me when i am so weak. love brought me to this place, holds me tightly here, comforts and soothes, pours out anew every morning.

it's full and big and wide.

love is enough to answer my deepest doubts, my strongest regrets, my dreams and hopes.

love is enough and i am in love. and i will give love. and like my abba before me, i will be love.

healing reign

we stepped out, a ragamuffin, eclectic group of mixed gender, younger and older, full of hope, dreaming of the power of prayer and

we sought the favor of God.

we sought to bring a people further.

we sought to see His healing reign poured down.

we sought His glory.

and we sang and prayed, worshipped and spoke God's word, we danced and bowed down, we lifted up our hands and we humbly, in silence waited and watched and hoped.

we prayed for new jobs and physical healings and we prayed for renewed hope and we heard and witnessed His mighty, thunderous reign pour down.

He was there, in true community. And I was set free. My passion married my heart and I stood in awe.

He is God.

He is stirring our hearts.

He is Coming.